Part 2: Andrew

Ok...we have known Andrew for about 12 years or more. He goes to our church so that's how we met him.

Andrew's parents divorced when he was young and he went to California to live with his dad (Andrew is an only child). When he was about 10 or so, his dad died and Andrew found him dead. He got shipped off to AZ to live with his mother and where TV raised him except Friday night from sundown to Saturday night sundown (the Sabbath). He was never aloud to spend the night at his friends houses, or ever aloud to date, and this continued until he was over 18. His mom is a musician that makes money by playing the piano for many different churches and at weddings. She doesn't make a ton of money so they try to be very frugal about everything they buy.

This family is so frugal that they go around picking up junk that people throw away in their junk piles to get rid of. They bring it home "in case" they could use it for something. This is so bad that they had so much stuff in their house that I would consider them hoarders. In fact, I just read about Compulsive Hoarding Syndrome, and it fits Andrew perfectly.... http://www.ocfoundation.org/hoarding/about-hoarding/compulsive-hoarding-syndrome-introduction.php. They did have little pathways through their house, the living room was so full of things, almost to the ceiling. Their carport was full of junk, along with the back yard. He doesn't work except on occasion to get a little cash. He is very smart with mechanical things, so he has helped us fix things for cheap.

About 5 years ago, his mother, Pat, met someone and about 2 years later, married him. They bought another house and he won't let her do her hoarding thing. Andrew lived with Pat for so many years and they had to tell him that he had to leave because they were going to fix up the house and rent it out. He was all upset and couldn't think about what to do. Someone gave him a trailer in a trailer park, but it is not in good condition and needs serious work done on it. He has to pay $250 per month for the lot it is on. He has some money because he has saved it his whole life on the jobs he's worked here and there. Since he had to leave his mom's house, he started taking his things over to his trailer and storing them there. He also has a bunch of things at my house that were only going to be there for a few months and have been there over 2 years now. Believe me, I have told him to take it several times but he keeps saying that he'll take some when he goes out to his trailer (it's about 45 minutes away from my house...maybe an hour at most).

He started seeing this one girl, Jessica, that has a 2 year old and 4 year old. He stayed with her for a couple of months before they both moved up to Prescott, AZ. He was there a couple of months before they broke up. He will watch her kids on the weekends for her so she doesn't have to pay for daycare then. Then he would come down here to do things and go to church. We would let him stay one or two nights here to save on gas. Then his car broke down. He fixed it once about a year ago but it broke down again. It has some serious issues going on in the engine. Since he's not aloud to work on vehicles at his trailer, Chuck told him that he could work on it at our house. We thought he'd be here for a couple days at a time and then go back to his trailer do do stuff there, since that's what he'd been talking about.

He started off by being here about 5 days at first. He didn't even look at his car for the first 3 days. He sat in the house watching TV. I said something to him "Andrew, I don't mind you staying here for one or two nights, as long as you're working on your car, but if this is just going to be a place that you come to flop to get away from Jessica, then NO! You have a trailer to do that at". He gave me some BS about how he's trying to figure out how to do certain things. I told him that he needed to start by lifting the hood of his car and looking at it. This went on for about 3 weeks and he only would do a little work on it every now and then. I then had another talk with him, that was longer and not sugar coated at all. I told him how he was making me mad and I wanted to see him working on it more than 30 minutes a day. I wanted him to work on it for at least 6 hours per day. All I get is a sigh and how he is working on it. I would call my kids when I was at work to see what he was doing and they would pretty much say that he was watching TV. I was getting so furious. Not only was he not doing what I asked him to do, but he also answer my phone, after telling him several times not to, and he never even asked us if he could stay until his car was done.

I would get up in the middle of the night (or early in the morning) and walk out to my kitchen for a drink and he'd be up watching TV! 3:00 in the morning and watching TV! Normally, this wouldn't bother me if someone was doing this, even him, if he wasn't supposed to be working on his car. I told him that 3:00 in the morning is a ridiculous time to be awake when he has to work on his car and I didn't want him sleeping in until Noon! I got a sigh again! I told him that he has no concept of time, that Chuck and I do because we have jobs and only have a day or two per week to get things done. Our time is precious because we have lots of things to do, and have kids. He doesn't get it!!!!!!!!!! I don't know how much more blunt I can be to him!

Oh, I forgot, in the meantime, his other vehicle broke down, so now I'm having to prod him on 2 vehicles. He finally got his van fixed but he took forever and he befriended my gear head neighbors and kept talking to them. I felt like I was living in Hell! He wouldn't leave or fix his vehicles...at least not in my time frame! I even told him it's my house, my rules! He didn't care! He finally fixed his van last Friday. Then Saturday, he did nothing but sit around all day. So Sunday, Chuck talked to him and told him that he had to leave. Since he decided NOT to fix his car and one of his vehicles was running now, it was time to go. He could come back this weekend to pick up the car and tow it away.

He was complaining to Chuck that I was being unreasonable and controlling! And how he was sleeping in an uncomfortable love seat, and how the kids would keep him awake. Then GO HOME! That's my answer to it all! How can my kids keep him awake when he was still awake at 3 in the AM? He didn't care that he was being an inconvenience to us on parking! Between all of our vehicles, we were having to park 9 vehicles! That's crazy! 2 of the vehicles were his, 3 are mine and Chuck's, 2 are my son's, one my daughter's and the last one was my son's friend's, Dennis, who stays with us too. We offered Andrew our van because it needs a new engine and we aren't going to fix it. He of course, will take it. So this weekend Chuck and Andrew are going to tow it up to some land that Andrew has.

He wanted to come here on Thursday and Chuck told him no, he can come on Friday. Then he wanted to go to church first on Saturday, then tow the van. His land is about 4 hours away, one way and he is slow. Chuck said no way...no church because he only has a limited amount of time to do that. They also have to tow Andrew's car to his trailer so that takes more time. He's driving us nuts!

I swear, there will be no more house guests! People have ruined it for others that might benefit from it. Let me rephrase that! Dennis can stay, he has a job! I also consider him like one of my own kids because he have practically raised him for the last 7 years or so.

So now, with the exception of Dennis, if you live at my house, you have to be related by blood or marriage...and even then, it questionable, lol!